So the news update is there is no update. I
actually had a surprise encounter with him, which didn't result in any clarity
or resolution, just confusion especially in how I feel. I've noticed that it’s
been harder and harder for me to make any decision; even relatively easy
decisions are difficult like where to go to dinner. I think its because my
feelings have become jaded, numb, and absent. After seeing him I cried, of
course, but then I tried to distinguish how I was feeling and it scared me that I
couldn't recognize anything. Is this considered an emotional wall? an
emotional Berlin Wall? I'm better now at masking my feelings or at least living
with what’s going on but I still hate it. So in an attempt to feel I did
something... Meet Sochi my 13-week-old puppy!
She’s the most well-behaved, sweet, playful,
adorable, cuddly yellow lab in the world. I knew the moment I saw her she was
mine. She crawled into my lap, fell asleep, and didn't move until we left. News
flash MONEY CAN BUY YOU HAPPINESS and a best friend!!!! She will never leave
me. I know I didn't rescue her from a shelter or neglect but I think she might
just rescue me! That’s at least my prayer. I’ll train her to be my best
companion (hiking, biking, running, swimming, camping, road trips, kayaking, surfing?).
Kendall + Sochi = BFF's fur ever
* And no her name has nothing to do with mother
Russia, I just liked the way it sounds... and maybe I want her to be a
champion, with a heart of gold.
"There is no psychiatrist in the world
like a puppy licking your face"
-Ben Williams-
